אם הגעתם לכאן וחיפשתם אתר אחר, אז סבלנות.
אנחנו מטפלים בהכל. לאט לאט.
ספיישל פסח! From: abakarir Views: 1016 28 ratings Time: 34:03 More in Entertainment
"Guess I’m still in the doghouse with your mom."
"You’re not in the doghouse!" your girlfriend’s daughter says.
"Oh I sure am," you tell her. "You wouldn’t understand. It’s a grown-up thing."
"You’re not in the doghouse! My mom left you two years ago. She left both of us."
"She’s just taking some time to blow off steam," you explain. "It’s a grown- up thing. Hope when she gets back I’ll get out of the doghouse."
"You’re not in the doghouse," she says. "And I am a grown-up. I turned 18 three months ago and I got a lawyer that says I can evict you from my mom’s house."
She hands you papers.
"But you’re all I have left of your mom," tell her. "And I’m all you have left of her."
"Move on," she says. "I have."
You fold up the papers and pack your things.
Happy Doghouse Day!
You’re the main character in a porno movie called The Fuck Happy World Of Brad. That’s why you feel so fuck happy and you keep having sex during what should be routine situations. Like when you bump into your neighbor by the mailboxes and the two of you have sex in the lobby and the doorman joins in. Or when you’re bartending and that woman comes in looking for a job and you tell her you’ll put in a good word so the two of you have sex.
"I just want to go back to my day," you think while having sex. "I want to just be."
You don’t know you’re a character in a porno so to you this is madness. If you were told you were a character in a porno you might experience a brief moment of relief (porn ends) but then someone else would push play and you’d get back to it. There is no escape. There is no end. The Fuck Happy World Of Brad is both finite and eternal, and it is all you’ll never know.
Happy The Fuck Happy World Of Brad Day!
אזהרה! סרטון מזעזע! גבר צעיר הורג באכזריות אכזרית כלבלב מסכן עם אבן גדולה! הצפייה על אחריות הצופה! From: abakarir Views: 1918 61 ratings Time: 00:45 More in Entertainment
WOOH. Sick and sick kid. Wish me luck, geeks.
Doreen is making your pizza. It says so on the tracker. It says your pizza is being made, and for the seven minutes it takes before it says your pizza is out for delivery, you can stare at your computer screen and envision your best friend Doreen making you dinner. She’s applying the toppings and fluffing the crust and putting it in the oven with care.
“You put in the order yet?” Sam asks. Sam’s your boyfriend. He used to go out with Doreen.
You don’t answer Sam. You just watch the pizza tracker. You ordered the pizza with a fake name so Doreen wouldn’t know it’s you she’s cooking for. She doesn’t know where you and Sam moved to (he had to move out of his apartment with Doreen) so she won’t recognize the address either. She has no idea she’s making a dinner for her former best friend. She has no idea how much her former best friend is savoring watching the little bar on the tracker. Doreen has no idea how much you miss her.
Your pizza is out for delivery.
You go downstairs with Sam and wait for it to arrive, trying to focus on you and him, trying to convince yourself he was worth it. But it’s no use. All you can do is listen for the car outside, search the air for the scent of pepperoni, anticipate the moment when a little bit of your best friend is delivered back into your life.
Happy Domino Doreen Day!
בואו לפייסבוק שלי http://facebook.com/AbakarirOfficial From: abakarir Views: 213 7 ratings Time: 03:15 More in Entertainment
בואו לפייסבוק שלי http://facebook.com/AbakarirOfficial From: abakarir Views: 164 5 ratings Time: 08:59 More in Entertainment
בואו לפייסבוק שלי http://facebook.com/AbakarirOfficial From: abakarir Views: 121 5 ratings Time: 07:03 More in Entertainment